Day: November 8, 2025

• Growing up, my family moved frequently, and I often switched schools and educational methods.
• I attended public school and private school, and also had stints doing homeschooling.
• When I became a teacher and a parent, I learned that education is not a one-size-fits-all approach.

When I was younger, I experienced nearly every type of schooling: homeschool, private, and public. By the time I reached middle school and convinced my parents to send me back to the public school system, I spent a lot of my time resenting my parents’ decisions because I felt like an outsider in that foreign space — it was as though my peers were speaking in an entirely different language, and, as a result, I struggled socially. But becoming both a parent and a public school teacher shifted my perspective.

I switched schools 10 times

We moved around a lot because my father was a “church planter,” which meant that I switched schools 10 times. Not only that, my parents often switched between different schooling methods, from public to homeschooling to private, and then back again to public, depending on what was happening in our lives and what they felt best suited our current situation. Finances were consistently tight, so we didn’t always live in areas where my parents felt comfortable sending us to public school.

During elementary school, I often resisted being homeschooled or attending a private evangelical Christian school, so the summer before seventh grade, I begged my parents to let me return to public school. They agreed, but that transition was also difficult. I felt like a fish out of water, completely naive and innocent in terms of pop culture and developmental knowledge. In other words, no matter which form of schooling I endured, there were real challenges: physical, mental, and emotional. No single method or school emerged as a clear winner.

Now that I’m a parent, I look back and think about how my mom and dad — who became parents at 17 and 19 — did the best they could, given their tenuous life circumstances. They really tried to give us a good life, and, for the most part, they did.

I became a teacher to pay it forward

After graduating from college, I attended graduate school to become a secondary English teacher — mostly because I wanted to pay it forward as a thank-you to all the amazing teachers and mentors I’d had along the way. It was through my decadelong classroom experience that I learned, firsthand, how every child — and every family — is different.

I worked tirelessly in Title I schools, doing my best to provide each student with the highest quality education possible. I taught students with a wide range of cognitive, physical, emotional, and language abilities. I customized learning plans and communicated with parents, faculty, and staff to ensure student needs were being met. Most of the time, my team and I were successful in our endeavors.

However, there were times when a student needed additional support, and we weren’t able to meet their needs to the caregivers’ satisfaction. We had hard conversations with their guardians, and what we found was that if there was an alternative option on the table that felt better suited for the child, they’d transfer them to a different school.

I remember feeling heartbroken on those rare occasions — like I’d let both the caregiver and the child down. But, in the end, I learned to trust what the guardian thought was best, and, now, as a parent, I understand this. I want what’s best for my children, too, and I’m in a fortunate place where I’m able to be somewhat selective about my children’s schooling.

My experiences affected how I look at school as a parent

Through my life experience, I’ve come to see that no single educational path is perfect, and each family makes the best choices they can with the options available — not always the ideal. Today, I have my kids in both public and private Montessori schools — my 5-year-old daughter attends a nearby public Montessori school, while my 3-year-old daughter took her older sister’s place at a private Montessori school this past fall.

My husband and I plan for our youngest to remain there until kindergarten, and then we will revisit and decide which educational pathway we feel will best suit her needs. Our children are currently thriving, and we’ve chosen to place both of them in Montessori schools because we believe in the goal as defined by Maria Montessori: “the development of the complete human being, oriented to the environment, and adapted to his/her time, place, and culture.”

It’s a solution that works for our family at the moment, but may change in the future. I’m fully aware and accepting of this truth. Parenting, like education, isn’t a straightforward path — it’s a journey full of detours, hard left turns, and, very rarely, cruise control.

• This post originally appeared in the BI Today newsletter.
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Welcome back! Business Insider is wrapping up its series, Lonely at the Top, a look at how wealth impacts relationships. In our final feature, millionaires share that it’s not exactly envy that’s driven their friendships away. It’s a bit more complicated.

On the agenda:

• Mark Cuban is no fan of Donald Trump, but he cheered this TrumpRx deal.
• How a sports nutritionist blends carbs, protein, and fiber throughout his diet to fuel workouts.
• Some moms are using AI to co-parent their children.
• Ten signs of over-the-top wealth and luxury in Vancouver.

But first: What kind of MIL do you have?

If this was forwarded to you, sign up here. Download Business Insider’s app here.

This week’s dispatch

6 Types of Mother-in-Laws

I got really lucky. When I met my mother-in-love, as I like to call her, we immediately started talking about “The Real Housewives of Potomac” — and the rest was history. Still, not everyone is so fortunate as to get along with their MIL.

Don’t worry, though: Before you head to your partner’s house for Thanksgiving, knowing what type of in-law you have can help improve communication and ultimately your relationship.

Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, a clinical psychologist and author of “You, Your Husband, and His Mother,” identified six different types of mother-in-law, although she noted that some mothers can fall into more than one category.

“The idea is not so much that we put people in boxes,” she told Business Insider’s Julia Pugachevsky. “It’s so we can understand what behavior is showing up.”

Ready to spot your MIL? Here goes:

• The Martyr: She gives, but often with strings attached. For example, she may offer to babysit, then complain. Dalgleish said it’s important not to let guilt affect your boundaries.
• The Victim: She feels like life is “happening” to her and is powerless. Dalgleish warned not to be “pulled into this pattern of wanting to rescue them.”
• The Blamer: She criticizes and may try to control. Dalgleish said in order to avoid a power struggle, “focus inward on your chosen family.”
• The Controller: She insists that there’s a right way of doing things, such as cultural or religious norms. Dalgleish said it’s important to “trust the decisions you’re making.”
• The Distancer: She keeps her distance, fearing she might overstep. Dalgleish encourages couples to articulate how they would like to receive support.
• The Supporter: Considered the “jackpot” of MILs, she’s often willing to listen and offer help. Even in this dynamic, it’s important to “work on really clear and healthy communication,” Dalgleish said.

Turns out that the key to surviving Thanksgiving dinner is knowing which mother-in-law is sitting across from you. Good luck!

Where credit’s due

Mark Cuban is a longtime critic of Donald Trump, but he praised the president for a TrumpRx deal that slashes the costs of Ozempic and other weight-loss drugs.

Cuban told Business Insider that he and Trump are working from the same playbook to cut costs for consumers. The “Shark Tank” businessman owns Cost Plus Drugs, which on Thursday announced a deal to cut the cost of an expensive Crohn’s disease medication.

Game recognizes game.

Fueling up

Dr. Samuel Impey, who focuses on endurance training and was formerly the lead nutritionist for the British cycling team, has a passion for bread — specifically fresh sourdough.

He eats carbs like potatoes or rice to fuel up before a run or to recover after one. Impey isn’t packing on the protein, though. He prefers to sprinkle it in throughout every meal. He also tries to hit his daily fruit and vegetable goal for fiber.

It’s all about balance.

An unlikely co-parent

Since Lilian Schmidt turned to ChatGPT for parenting advice — and it worked — she said she’s felt a lot calmer. Schmidt now makes TikToks about it and even sells a “vault” of pre-made prompts for other parents to use.

For many parents, balancing childcare with a full-time job can feel like a lot. Whether it’s meal prep, planning activities, or homework help, using AI for parenting can be a helpful tool when used correctly, she said.

What parents should — and shouldn’t — use AI for.

Bougie B.C.

Vancouver is the second-richest city in Canada, home to 46,400 millionaires and 11 billionaires. On a trip there this year, BI’s Joey Hadden clocked 10 signs of extravagance, from palatial mansions to yacht-filled harbors.

Hadden also spent a night at the five-star Fairmont Pacific Rim, where she said her room’s bathroom felt like a private spa. Construction on Vancouver’s Billionaire Row was busy — so it looks like the city’s wealth is only growing.

Welcome to Vancouver.

What we’re watching this weekend

• “Frankenstein”: Netflix teams with Oscar-winner Guillermo del Toro to deliver the latest adaptation of the Frankenstein monster starring Oscar Isaac and Jacob Elordi.
• “Downton Abbey: The Grand Finale:” On Peacock, watch the feature-film final chapter of this beloved series, as the Crawleys grapple with changing times.
• “Materialists”: Over on HBO Max is this A24 rom-com starring Dakota Johnson as a matchmaker in New York City. The movie also stars Chris Evans and Pedro Pascal.

What to shop

• Surprisingly great jeans: We put Abercrombie’s size-inclusive denim collection to the test by trying on seven of its most popular pairs. The fabric, fit variety, and style options really hit the mark, and they’ve become our style team’s favorite under-$100 jeans.
• Look good bundled up: From frosty commutes to wind-whipping walks, these are the women’s winter coats worth the hype. Whether you’re into cloud-like puffers, tailored wool, or something that doesn’t turn you into a walking marshmallow, these picks are warm, wearable, and winter-ready.
• Sleepwear worth showing off: Looking for PJs that feel like an upgrade, not an afterthought? From crashing early to lounging late, these men’s pajamas bring comfort, fit, and a touch of style to your off-duty hours.

Inside Italy’s $1 home promotion

A couple moved to Sicily, Italy, to pursue its viral $1 homes. They ended up spending a lot more than that, but said it was worth every penny.

More of this week’s top reads:

• I’m a luxury event planner. My clients don’t want “Quiet Luxury” — they want a multi-day spectacle.
• A 43-year-old pharmacist with a Ph.D. in topical skincare says she uses four products to keep her glow as she ages.
• I bought the viral Starbucks bear cup after camping outside the store at 1 a.m. They only had two in stock.
• My dad, President Jimmy Carter, taught me that you shouldn’t retire. I’m 75 and following his example, and not slowing down.
• I thought traveling alone would be awkward or boring — but my first solo trip proved me wrong with its surprising perks.
• I tried Taco Bell’s Mountain Dew Baja Blast pie. I can see — and taste — who the fast food restaurant is targeting.
• Tired of doomscrolling? It’s time to start using an “analog bag.”
• Sydney Sweeney said it was “surreal” that President Trump reacted to her controversial American Eagle ad.

The BI Today team: Dan DeFrancesco, deputy editor and anchor, in New York. Akin Oyedele, deputy editor, in New York. Grace Lett, editor, in New York. Amanda Yen, associate editor, in New York.

• I’ve been married — and divorced — three times.
• I thought I might be lonely after my last divorce, but in time, I realized I’ve never been happier.
• I’ve decided to stop dating and started focusing on building a life I love.

I have been married three times. I have been divorced three times. And now, I have gracefully bowed out of dating or the thought of remarrying.

I learned from each of my marriages: Patience, forgiveness, self-reliance, and how to pack a moving van.

After decades of hopefully and stubbornly clinging to the idea that I would find lasting love, when I found myself in the wreckage of my third marriage, I finally woke up to the wrenching truth that marriage isn’t for me. I looked back on my relationships and came to the sudden realization that, as much as I tried, maybe I’m not the marrying kind, have no idea what I’m doing, or am clueless about what makes a good life partner or how to be one. Or, likely, all of the above.

Even after all this, I still believe in love. But as much as I believed, and worked, furied, and frayed for love, I walked away with my heart an empty, deflated paper bag, wrinkled and ripped, unable to carry another thing.

It took time, but I realized I was happier after my last divorce

For a while, I was deeply disappointed and ashamed. To go through husbands like other people go through cars. Or sneakers. It wasn’t what I wanted or expected. It was far from what I vowed to do. I fought three losing wars for love, and in the end, decided to fly a permanent white flag.

After a year of learning to breathe again following my last divorce, I distracted my mind by teaching myself how to make candles, sitting with myself and crying to heartbreak songs, and then belting out empowerment and fighter songs way too loud. I realized that I had not lost. I was not lost. I was finally found. I didn’t feel hollow or bitter. I felt I was becoming…someone. I could just be without having to be just right. I could follow my whims down winding paths.

My arms may have been empty, but my hands were full — learning, doing, building, and creating a life I wanted and loved. I bought a house in the woods to provide a peaceful, safe haven for my two youngest children and me. Instead of feeling as though my bed was empty, I reveled in the freedom to stretch out under pink, fuzzy blankets, buoyed on heaps of pillows, and watch TV until 2 am.

Rather than hearing the echoes of broken promises, I listened to birdsongs in the woods, and could identify every one. I got a dog. I got two. I planted a giant garden. I got into debt and learned how to get out of it. I started a business. I started two.

Though occasionally I miss having a partner, I still don’t want to date

Are there things I miss about having a partner? Yes. Shared dreams and futures can be fulfilling and comforting, and if that had happened for me again, that would have been another kind of joy. Once in a while, I miss movie dates and hand-in-hand walks on the beach. I’m no mechanic or handyman, and my old car and house need both. I have to bring home the bacon and fry it up in the pan. But for me, after everything, the benefits of being single far outweigh the drawbacks of being in the dark and chill, trying to light matches in the rain.

I have been single now for eight years, and I plan to stay that way. I don’t date — I never have since my last divorce, and don’t want to. I was tired of giving myself away. I expected to feel lonely without the companionship of a partner, but I have never been happier. I felt far lonelier when I was with a partner, when I had to twist and abandon myself to belong. I finally feel like a whole person after shedding my other halves.

I have an abundance of love in my life from my family, children, friends, and animals. After decades of devoting my time, energy, body, hopes, and dreams to others, I cherish getting to finally choose what I do with every minute of my life — I read, I write, I grow things, I make things, I discover things. I feel free. I am better, feel better, on my own. My happiness is luminous, and my heart is full. My face is turned to the sun.

• The youngest member of Goldman’s newest class of managing directors is 29 years old.
• Paulo Costa, promoted Thursday, is based in London and spoke to Business Insider about making MD.
• The trader leads dividend trading in Goldman’s synthetic products group in EMEA.

By early Thursday afternoon, cheers celebrating Goldman Sachs’ newly promoted managing directors had been mounting for hours throughout the firm’s London office.

Paulo Costa heard the trader across from him — whose last name starts with an X — take the call he had been hoping for. He presumed the calls would be rolled out in alphabetical order, and thought, “Oh, hang on, this is starting to feel a little strange,” he told Business Insider.

At last, the call came: he’d been named managing director — and, at 29, the youngest in this year’s class.

Costa — an executive director overseeing dividend trading across Europe, the Middle East, and Africa — was among the 638 employees in this year’s Goldman MD class. He said that it marked the culmination of a remarkable year, personally and professionally.

His promotion comes on the heels of a strong run for Goldman’s equities division, where third-quarter revenues climbed 7% compared to the same period a year earlier. The bank cited higher net revenues in financing, an area adjacent to Costa’s work, as a key driver.

Seated a few rows away from Costa when the call came was his wife, who is a prime broker at Goldman. The two met at the firm in 2018 and married this year.

“She was definitely the first person that I spoke to,” once he’d hung up the phone, he said.

The road to managing director

Costa runs dividend trading within the bank’s equities division, helping big investors like hedge funds make bets on stocks without actually buying them, using financial contracts that move with share prices. His team manages the dividend component of those deals, ensuring that when companies pay shareholders, those payouts are accurately reflected in the value and cash flows of the trades.

He has weathered a few volatile markets, from the pandemic to this year’s market sell-off in the spring. Past experiences, he said, made him “more aware” of how to approach choppy markets.

“When you really learn about the markets and the inner plumbing of things, is when things get messy,” he said, recalling how unusual trading conditions during the COVID pandemic shaped his approach.

Born and raised in Portugal in a family of doctors, Costa said his parents hoped he’d follow in their footsteps and pursue a career in medicine. But the MD title he clinched this week has proven just as satisfying. Choosing finance over medicine came as “a bit of a shock,” he said, “but I think they’re happy I did it.”

“When I was 11 or 12 years old, we went through the European sovereign crisis,” he said. “I became very interested in how the financial markets were crashing at home. I started to read up about it and started to do very small trades when I was that age.”

Costa attended the University of Warwick, where he served as the equities chief investment officer for the Warwick Investment Fund, and joined Goldman as a summer analyst in the securities division in 2016.

He advised those who might want to follow his path should find what interests them. “You’re only ever going to be very good if you can work hard at something for a very long time, perfecting your craft,” he said.

Inside the celebration

By the time the announcement became official on Thursday, Goldman’s London trading floor was already buzzing. Some of the regional leaders, including members of the bank’s European Management Committee, convened a Champagne toast for new MDs on the office’s eighth floor, followed by a larger-scale gathering of about 150 people at a drinks venue nearby.

Some of Costa’s former colleagues and mentors appeared as well — including Lorenzo Longo, a former Goldman colleague and mentor who helped guide Costa early in his career. “He was almost as excited for my phone call as my wife,” Costa said with a laugh.

But now he’s stepping into the role they once held — a leadership position which will bring new responsibilities and expectations. Was he anxious about bearing those new duties at age 29? No, he said: “I don’t think I necessarily have to impose myself now as a leader more than I was a week ago.”

But he didn’t deny the “gravitas” he said it comes with. “It certainly helps being a young person to get the title,” he conceded, reflecting on the 21-year-old version of himself that was starting his career at the bank.

“I was already beyond proud of working here” at the time, he said. “I never imagined that, when I was 29, I would be at this stage of my career.”